C oming Up in This Column: Mission: Impossible—Ghost Protocol, The Descendants, Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows, My Week with Marilyn, Love & Other Drugs, The Great Moment, Susan Slept Here, but first. Fan Mail: In talking about the final shot of the wedding of the twins in The Palm Beach Story, David Ehrenstein dragged out his favorite Fritz Lang quote about how it’s “because in. MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE - GHOST PROTOCOL. The Abridged Script. Movie: January 12, 2012. This script published under Creative Commons BY-NC-SA 3.0. Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol Synopsis: In the fourth installment of the Mission Impossible series, Ethan Hunt and a new team race against time to track down Hendricks, a dangerous terrorist who has gained access to Russian nuclear launch codes and is planning a strike on the United States.
Really, any aspiring screenwriter, whether they’re writing action adventure movies or romantic comedies, should watch the latest installment in the Mission Impossible franchise. Yes, it’s that good.
Regular readers of Scribe Meets World might be wondering why I haven’t compared the Mission Impossible 4 screenplay to the version released in theaters. I would love to, but I haven’t been able to find a copy of the script. It’s still under lock and key, probably guarded by the IMF itself, even though the movie’s already had a worldwide release.
I do know however, from this article on Collider.com, that Brad Bird filmed the movie with the idea that Ethan’s wife was dead. But the director rethought the issue…
“Well, we were well into the film thinking that she had been killed, and filmed quite a bit of the film thinking that she wasn’t around, and we just kept thinking that that kind of cast the previous movie in a negative light because it’s kind of like all that stuff that he went through to keep her alive in the last one didn’t ultimately amount to anything.”
“Simon Pegg mentioned that it was kind of like the feeling that you had about Aliens after seeing Alien 3, where she goes through unbelievable hell to save a couple of people, and then both of them died before the third movie.”
…proving once again why every movie is instantly better the minute Simon Pegg is cast in it. So that’s one change from the script.
Even without being able to compare MI4’s screenplay to its film version, there’s still plenty of action writing tips to learn if you study the movie with an analytical eye, assessing each of its components to see why it worked so well. That’s what I’ve done here.
In Ghost Protocol’s plot points, I wrote that Mission: Impossible 4 made action writing look easy–and if you study these screenwriting tips, you’ll see that a lot of them are almost kind of obvious, if you stop to think about it.
But most amateur screenwriters don’t stop to think about it. They leap into their draft, hoping to save the world with high-speed car chases, explosions, and fake identities. But you’re not going to snag a mega star like Tom Cruise just by writing an action movie with a compelling hero, high stakes, and thrilling action set pieces.
You have to write an action movie which stands out from the crowd. These tips should help you accomplish just that. If you follow them, you should have a blueprint for an action movie which might even get Mr Cruise’s attention.
To make the most of these action writing tips, you should have clear idea of your hero, his goal, and his antagonist. At the very least, you should have a bare-bones script outline with the 8 essential plot points, but ideally, you’d have a fleshed out story outline (for more on story outlines and beat sheets, read A Script Outline: A Must Have to Write, Edit and Sell Your Screenplay). Compare the beats in your story outline with the action writing tips below and refine your outline as necessary.
Good luck! I hope that after reading this article on how to write an action movie, you’ll say to yourself, “screenwriting mission: accomplished!”
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #1: Save the cat…for another purpose
This action movie screenwriting tip won’t make much sense unless you’re familiar with Blake Snyder’s screenwriting guide, Save the Cat. Blake’s book is a great introduction to screenwriting basics, and I highly recommend it if you want an overview of the process, shared in an encouraging and motivational tone.
Anyway, the title of the book comes from Blake’s concept of “saving the cat,” which is basically having the hero do something in the first act which gets the audience to like him and root for him to win. That activity could be something nice and selfless like saving a cat. (For my corollary rule, “don’t kill the dog,” read screenwriting tip #4 from Salt and screenwriting tip #2 from Taken).
When you’re writing an action movie, and your hero does a selfless act like saving a cat, try to use that cat for another purpose in your screenplay. In Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol, at the beginning of the movie, Ethan is imprisoned in a Russian jail cell. His IMF colleagues, Benji and Jane, have orchestrated events behind the scenes, giving Ethan everything he needs to make a quick and easy escape. What does Ethan do?
He saves a cat.
Specifically, he goes out of his way to rescue another inmate, Bodgan, even though such a move was risky and almost cost Ethan his own freedom. Even if Bodgan never appeared in the movie again, it was a clever way to open the action-filled blockbuster, because it got the audience in sync with Ethan’s character right away. It made us connect with him on an emotional level, and that connection is just as important as adrenaline pumping escape sequences.
But MI4 went one step further–Bogdan makes a reappearance in the third act. Through Bogdan’s connections, Ethan learns the location of an obsolete satellite which Russia sold to India, information which Ethan needs to foil the plans of Hendricks, a crazy professor hellbent on initiating nuclear war. Without Bogdan, Ethan wouldn’t have gotten the information he needed, so Ethan’s selfless act of “saving the cat” at the beginning of the movie paid off in a big way in Act Three.
When you’re writing your own action movie, and you’ve constructed a nifty “save the cat” moment for your hero, ask yourself if “the cat” can be used for another purpose. He doesn’t necessarily have to be the person who provides vital information to the hero in Act Three.
The cat could be a woman…who becomes the hero’s love interest…or an unexpected villain. The point is, try to give “the cat” another function in your action movie besides getting the audience in sync with your hero.
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #2: Ticking time clocks really do work
You’ve probably heard that screenplays need a sense of urgency in order to capture a reader’s interest. This is especially true for action movies. You may try to avoid using a countdown, or a ticking time bomb, in your movie, just because they’re used a lot and you don’t want to be cliché.
But giving your hero a set time frame in order to accomplish a goal, (and having another character remind your hero that he’s running out of time), is a simple way to infuse an already tense action sequence with even more drama.
We respond to countdowns instinctively–they’re a cue to our senses, triggering an unconscious reaction which sets our nerves on edge, just the kind of visceral response you want to your action scenes.
Countdowns brought an extra layer of urgency to three key action set pieces in Mission: Impossible 4. When Ethan was scaling the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building in the world, Brandt would relay how much time Ethan had left before Moreau and Wistrom (two villainous characters) arrived on scene. Brandt’s countdown added an extra layer of urgency to a scene which already had the hallmarks of a killer action set piece.
Later in the movie, Ethan has to navigate the streets of Mumbai and find a telcom station–in less than 30 seconds. Thankfully, he has a snazzy BMW i8 at his disposal, which gives us the illusion that he can accomplish his goal, despite his limited time frame. Of course he doesn’t–setting up one of the last action set pieces in the movie.
By the time Ethan and Jane arrive at the telcom station, Hendricks has already launched his nuclear device. Now Ethan has about three minutes to communicate self-abort instructions to the nuclear device. Adding that ticking time bomb infuses Ethan’s smackdown with Hendricks with an added level of urgency.
But in this particular action scene, the countdown isn’t necessary. The world is on the brink of a nuclear meltdown, which is about as urgent as it gets. The inclusion of the countdown accomplished the impossible–it somehow made a highly urgent situation even more urgent.
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #3: Kill off the big guy
One of the most surprising plot twists in Mission: Impossible 4 (at least for me) is when Ethan meets the Secretary of the IMF in an SUV to discuss the explosion which occurred at the Kremlin. The Secretary gives Ethan dire news: the entire IMF has been disavowed and the President has initiated Ghost Protocol.
Should they choose to accept their next mission, Ethan and his team are entirely on their own. The Secretary gives Ethan a flash drive containing instructions, reminds Ethan of a secret cache of weapons, asserts that Ethan’s always been a good friend–and then suddenly, out of nowhere, the Secretary gets shot.
It was completely unexpected. The Secretary of the IMF is pretty big guy, politically speaking. He’s supposed to be calling the shots, not the one getting shot. He’s supposed to make it to the end of the movie so he can congratulate Ethan when Ethan redeems himself and his team. When the Secretary gets killed, it sends a clear message: in MI4, all bets are off. No one is sacrosanct–and that ups the ante for sure.
However, even without the death of the Secretary, the scene in the SUV was dramatic enough–Ghost Protocol isn’t something to be taken lightly. Killing the Secretary took an already dramatic scene to a whole new level.
Please don’t kill off an important character to add drama to a dragging scene–the effect won’t be the same. If you do kill off an important character quite unexpectedly like the way they did in MI4, make sure it’s the capper to a scene already laden with dramatic tension.
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #4: Incorporate a major landmark into your action set piece
Mission: Impossible 4’s midpoint had one of the best action set pieces ever: Ethan Hunt had to scale the exterior of the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building in the world, with walls made of smooth glass, and with only funky “blue is glue” adhesion gloves to aid him. The Burj Khalifa is one hell of a landmark to choose as the backdrop for a scene which is already naturally loaded with dramatic tension (tension which is amplified by Brandt’s nonstop countdown!).
Action set pieces are always enhanced when they take place against a backdrop that’s a landmark in some way. What exactly constitutes a landmark? Wikipedia defines a landmark as, “anything that is easily recognizable, such as a monument, building, or other structure. In American English it is the main term used to designate places that might be of interest to tourists due to notable physical features or historical significance.” Basically, a landmark is any structure that’s distinctive in some way, whether in size, beauty, age, significance, etc.
Ghost Protocol wasn’t the only Mission: Impossible movie to make use of a landmark as a dramatic backdrop. In MI3, Ethan stunt jumped from one glittering Shangahi skyscraper to another…although I’d argue that the action sequence in MI4 was infinitely more enjoyable to watch.
In Salt, the Act Three action set piece takes place in the President’s underground bunker, while the Act Three action set piece in X-Men 3 made use of the iconic Golden Gate bridge as its backdrop. I have the sneaky suspicion that the thriller, The International, was only made because it featured an extensive action scene inside the Guggenheim museum–the most unlikely place for a shootout! Try to top that.
Make sure though that it logically makes sense for the action set piece to take place at the landmark location you’ve carefully chosen. In MI4, we’re told that Hendricks and Moreau are both headed to Dubai, so who are we to question an action sequence taking place at its most distinctive building.
In general, the Mission: Impossible movies can whiz from one exotic location to the next–that’s part of their charm, just like the Bond movies–but without a logical explanation, an audience watching your action movie might become skeptical.
Whatever location you choose to use as a landmark, it’s probably been used before, maybe in a movie that never even got greenlit. It doesn’t matter. Just try to come up with something new and different.
One last point: if you noticed, a lot of the examples I named used an impressive landmark as the backdrop to an action set piece which occurs in the Act Three. MI4 used the Burj Khalifa at the movie’s midpoint. I’d be cautious of using a landmark at the midpoint instead of saving it for the end, because everything else afterwards has the potential to feel anticlimactic.
Although it never topped the Burj Khalifa scene, I think Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol did a pretty good job of maintaining audience interest…but others, like Anne Billson of The Guardian, feel differently.
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #5: Layer your obstacles
In screenwriting tip #9 from Star Trek, I commented that “great action sequences read like an obstacle course devised by a highly intelligent madman.” Obviously, scaling the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building in the world, whose exterior is made of smooth glass, with only one adhesion glove at your disposal is a scene rife with obstacles…but other scenes in Mission: Impossible 4, much smaller in scope, were full of obstacles too.
One of my favorite scenes in Ghost Protocol is a brief, one-minute scene which isn’t even that important in the grand scope of things. Ethan and Brandt are trying to board train car #47, where Benji, Jane, and a secret cache of IMF weapons are located. But Ethan and Brandt almost don’t make it.
Ethan has to authenticate that he’s really an IMF agent, so he has to enter a) his code b) press Enter and c) complete a retinal scan–all while the train is gaining speed, and he and Brandt are running alongside it. To complicate things further, there are these tall towery structures erected near the tracks (I have no idea what they are called in train terminology), but if Ethan and Brandt aren’t careful, they will run into these intermittently spaced structures as they try to keep pace with the train.
That’s five obstacles in a scene that’s only a minute long–and it made that simple goal of reaching car #47 so much more enjoyable to watch. Lesser writers would’ve scripted this scene completely differently, and would have wasted the opportunity to burden their heroes with more obstacles to overcome.
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #6: Echo the action
This is an action movie screenwriting technique I really hadn’t thought about before carefully studying Mission: Impossible 4. When I did, I noticed that a lot of the dramatic set pieces “echoed” some of the smaller moments of action, but in a way that was infused with much more adrenaline and dramatic tension. In a way, the smaller action moments ended up foreshadowing the bolder action set pieces.
For example, having to navigate daring vertical jumps is an action beat which repeats itself throughout Mission: Impossible 4. At the beginning of the movie, Ethan and Bogdan make a vertical jump into the sewers underneath a Russian prison. This action beat isn’t given much screentime; it’s just a minor taste of what’s to come.
Later, after the Kremlin explosion, Ethan is taken to a hospital. In order to escape Sidorov, the Russian agent sent to interrogate him, Ethan has to jump from a window ledge–and onto a moving car–a jump which echoes the one Ethan made with Bodgan.
But MI4 didn’t stop there. Later, at the end of the jaw-dropping Burj Khalifa set piece, in order to return to his hotel suite, Ethan has to rappel down the side of the tallest building in the world with only a black rope to aid him. When he runs out of rope, Ethan makes a daring leap into the hole in the glass wall of his hotel suite. Finally, at the end of the movie, Ethan dives into a white BMW and makes a 100-meter vertical drop in an automated parking garage–just in time to deactivate the nuclear device at the garage’s ground level.
For the most part, although each action set piece made use of the same “meme” (I can’t believe I used such a pretentious term!) of vertical jumps, each one was distinctive and took the level of action and danger just a little further. The BMW dive, in particular, benefited from the presence of the previous vertical jumps, because they prepared the audience for a scene which could’ve caused major suspension of disbelief.
If you do write an incredible action set piece, which, like the BMW dive, might trigger questions about plausibility, try to echo the same action earlier on in your screenplay. It will put those pesky questions to bed (at least a portion of them), and also imbue your script with a nice feeling of cohesion.
Just remember that if you employ this action writing technique, make sure each repetition, each echo, is distinct from the other–the way they were in Mission: Impossible 4. You cannot repeat beats in your screenplay because that will bore your audience. (This is probably one reason why a fight scene between the Enterprise and the Narada was cut from the 2009 Star Trek reboot.)
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #7: Give one of your characters a mysterious backstory
When Ethan first meets Brandt, Brandt is introduced as the IMF Secretary’s chief analyst, someone who’s good with scenarios but doesn’t have real field experience. When Ethan’s team prepares to trick both Moreau and Wistrom at the Burj Khalifa, Brandt’s lack of field experience makes him a prime candidate for the “doubting Thomas” character who functions as a credibility monitor and a source of humor.
But when everything goes haywire at Ethan and Brandt’s meeting with Moreau, Brandt reveals that he has amazing hand-to-hand combat skills–skills right on par with Ethan’s.
Brandt is more than just a top analyst...
It’s clear that there’s more to Brandt than meets the eye, adding a nice dose of intrigue to the plot. Later, Brandt reveals his backstory to Benji and Jane, how he was a field agent, but after a tragic mission goes wrong (a husband loses his wife), Brandt couldn’t make life or death decisions anymore. So he left the field and became an analyst. Finally, it’s revealed that Ethan was the husband under Brandt’s protection, and it was Ethan’s wife who was killed.
Whoa – what a whammy!
Giving Brandt an intriguing backstory which intertwined with Ethan’s past was pure genius. The screenplay didn’t have to take that route–Brandt’s character would have been fine as a reluctant fourth member of Ethan’s team. But Brandt’s backstory takes his character and role in the plot to a whole new level. Giving characters dual roles usually always pays off in a big way.
To use this screenwriting technique effectively, steal a page from the MI4 playbook: reveal that a character isn’t what he seems on the surface during a moment of crisis. In other words, revealing his true identity should be unintentional; this creates the intrigue as the audience wonders, “just who is this guy, anyway?” It’s your decision as to when to reveal his complete backstory and what his REAL relationship is to the hero.
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #8: You don’t have to show everything
Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol Script Pdf File
Remember when Ethan’s in the hospital, handcuffed to his patient bed? The camera zooms in on a paper clip holding together his medical report. As Sidorov argues with his colleague, Ethan uses the clip to break free of the cuffs and tries to escape via a window ledge. We never see Ethan pick the handcuff lock with the paper clip (is that even possible?) or go out onto the ledge because the camera is only focused on Sidorov–and that’s fine.
You don’t have to show EVERY hijink in an action movie, especially if you’re going for the “tongue in cheek” effect which was a huge part of Ghost Protocol’s charm.
Even if that’s not the tone you’re going for, it’s okay not to show every diabolical escape…just as long as you show enough of them, especially major ones which might occur at your midpoint or act breaks.
If your action screenplay is too long, ask yourself if you’ve shown too much, and scale back on some of your escape scenes. Maybe just hint at them instead of showing every detail, the way the handcuff scene was handled in Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol.
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #9: Choose an appropriate interval before paying off your setup
When Ethan is trying to scale the Burj Khalifa, an approaching sandstorm makes its presence known. Benji comforts Ethan, “it’s nothing to worry about.” And it isn’t anything to worry about–at least not yet. Not until after Ethan finishes his daring feat, not until after the tense cat-and-mouse game played with Wistrom and Moreau. It doesn’t become important until Ethan has to chase Wistrom through the streets of Dubai.
Then it takes over everything. Literally.
The sandstorm is perfectly set up in Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol
Having time elapse before the sandstorm became a major obstacle–and a set piece in its own right–was a smart move. When it finally takes over Dubai, it comes as an unexpected surprise, since our mind was preoccupied with everything that was happening between Ethan’s team and Moreau and Wistrom.
At the same time, because the sandstorm was established earlier on, it doesn’t seem like the natural disaster was magically conjured to inject some action into the plot. This is one reason why setup is so important; it strengthens your chain of cause and effect, creating a plot with momentum which hooks the audience and never lets go.
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #10: Split up the team at the climax
Cutting back and forth between two sets of characters as they’re trying to accomplish separate but related goals is a highly effective way to increase the drama and sense of urgency in your action adventure screenplay.
Before you split apart your characters, make sure you explain what exactly their goals are and that each goal must successfully be completed in order for the hero to win. Intercut between the two storylines, cutting away when your characters are knee-deep in drama.
This technique is best to exploit at your movie’s climax, although you can use it anywhere. Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol made use of this surefire method to escalate tension after the midpoint, when the IMF team members act as decoys for Moreau’s meeting with Wistrom.
Then, when the negotiations are concluded, the intercut technique was used again, as the movie cut from Jane’s smackdown with Moreau to Ethan’s desperate hunt for Wistrom. MI4 also used this technique to maximum effect at the movie’s climax, cutting in between Ethan, trying to abort the nuclear device from the automated parking garage, to the rest of the IMF team, who’re trying to restore power to the telcom station so the missile receives Ethan’s abort instructions.
If you really want to master this technique, you’ll have to hit the library, not the theaters–because JRR Tolkien was the king of this method and used it quite frequently throughout the Lord of the Rings trilogy. (With a whole fellowship to split up, he had numerous possibilities!)
Action Movie Screenwriting Tip #11: Introduce another pursuer
Another complication in Ethan’s increasingly complicated mission is Sidorov, the Russian agent who blames Ethan for the Kremlin explosion. In addition to pursuing Hendricks and preventing the crazy professor from launching a nuclear device, Ethan has to evade Sidorov, who could halt all of Ethan’s finely wrought plans. Sidorov is that outside pursuer, hot on the tail of our hero, not realizing that our hero is on a mission for good.
Including an additional pursuer is a great obstacle to add to your action screenplay, because if you time it right, you’ll have the perfect obstacle–unexpected and yet not implausible–right when you need it.
All you have to do is follow MI4’s model: introduce the outside pursuer and have him show up at the most inopportune moments, which occur well after the initial introduction. If enough time elapses, the audience forgets about the outside pursuer’s presence…and when he does arrive on the scene, the audience is completely surprised.
For example, in Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol, we meets Sidorov for the first time after the Kremlin explosion. We meet him again after the Secretary is shot. Then, as we’re completely absorbed in Ethan’s mission at the Burj Khalifa, we forget about Sidorov completely–until he almost prevents Ethan from chasing Wistrom through the streets of Dubai.
Imagine that sequence without Sidorov’s unexpected arrival. Sure, it would have had drama and tension and adrenaline–but would it have had as much?
Now, it’s time to get to work on your own action script. Well, you can procrastinate first by looking up the number of Tom Cruise’s agent, but then it’s time to get down to business!
Spy Catcher by John Goode
The Abridged Script
written by
Movie:
August 22, 2018
The Editing Room
https://the-editing-room.com/s#rclkl
FADE IN:
EXT. HAPPY SUNNY BEACH OF UNATTAINABLE BLISS
TOM CRUISE is getting MARRIED to either MICHELLE MONAGHAN or REBECCA FERGUSON but the glare makes it hard to tell which.
SEAN HARRIS
Don't worry, this is an evil dream anyway! Bwah ha, yes it's me, the Big Bad from 'Rogue Nation'! Everyone remembers me right?
(pause)
Right?
(pause)
Oh well fuck you too, KABOOOOOOM
(everything explodes)
INT. SAD DREARY WAREHOUSE OF ATTAINABLE BUMMERTUDE
TOM is woken up by a knock at the door.
SHADOWY FIGURE
Good evening, Mr. Cruise. To receive this mysterious package, please say the code phrase. Then click every part of this photo with a road sign in it.
TOM CRUISE
(intensely)
I AM THE STORM.
(clicks boxes)
(clicks 'not a robot')
(gets package)
The package is a BOOK with a STEAMPUNK SPY MESSAGE PROJECTOR inside!
VOICE ON TAPE
Ooookay I hope you're sitting down because this one takes a while to set up. You remember how there was an evil shadowy cult-like organization called the Scien--
TOM CRUISE
(smashes things)
VOICE ON TAPE
--dicate, I was saying Syndicate all along. Anyhoo most of them are dead and the ones who aren't are now called The Apostles. At various times in the movie they either work for, or with, or against a mysterious bad guy known only as... John Lark.
(pause)
So there are three plutonium cores which, for the purposes of this movie, are the ONLY source of plutonium anywhere on Earth. A crazy scientist guy wants to use them to build custom nukes for John Lark. Therefore YMSYCTAI, is to go buy the plutonium from some asshole who will try to act all important but who SOOOOOOO isn't.
INT. SHADOWY TUNNEL OF SHADINESS
TOM and SIMON PEGG meet with the plutonium-selling douchebag.
PLUTONIUM-SELLING DOUCHEBAG
Hey, I was told I'd be a major vill-
(SHUT UP YOU)
TOM CRUISE
(into radio)
Okay Ving, they've brought the plutonium, you can bring out the money!
SIMON PEGG
Wait a sec... you're asking Ving to carry the money from the surveillance van, all the way over here? You know about the 'no-walking' clause in his contract right?
TOM CRUISE
Shit! That means something's about to go horribly wrong--
VING RHAMES
Yeah, I'm being held hostage now! Held completely still, in one spot, and also hostage. But don't worry about me, get the plutonium!
SIMON PEGG
Quickly Tom, I've got the remote-controlled, stylish, performance-driven, surprisingly affordable BMW M5 special edition ready for our getaway! Grab the plutonium!
TOM CRUISE
(whips head intensely towards plutonium)
(whips head intensely towards Ving)
(whips head intensely towards plutonium again)
Dammit, what to do?! Well Black Panther already did a remote-controlled sports car this year, so...
(saves Ving)
There you go, buddy! I sure hope Simon took care of the plutonium.
SIMON PEGG
Huh? No I rushed over here to watch you save Ving and not help. Oops.
The PLUTONIUM --- IS GONE!
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM OF DEFEAT
On CNN, WOLF BLITZER covers the breaking story of the THREE NUKES that have been detonated in major populated areas.
TOM CRUISE
Shit, really? We're leading off with catastrophic failure? I mean none of the destroyed cities are American so it's just barely possible we might really be doing this...
EVIL SCIENTIST
(in hospital bed)
Ha ha ha! Silly American spies, you have failed, as evidenced by this CNN news feed, my only source of information!
TOM CRUISE
Ohhhh okay I see what we're doing. Um, since you've already won, how about unlocking this phone that has crucial information on it?
EVIL SCIENTIST
But of course, why not! The code to the phone is HUNT, you see that way it says 'I AM HUNT-LOCKED', it's a reference to
WOLF BLITZER
(bursting in)
AW YEEAHH WELCOME TO THE SITUATION ROOM AND THE SITUATION IS YOU DONE FUCKED UP ASSHOLE!!
(rips off mask)
It's really me, Simon!
VING RHAMES
And this isn't really a hospital room, it's IMF headquarters!
(walls dramatically slide upwards to reveal vast hangar)
Sure we could have used a normal room with some props but this reveal is WAY cooler.
EVIL SCIENTIST
No fair, you guys used this same trick to start the first M:I movie!
TOM CRUISE
Yeah, if that kind of thing is gonna be a problem for you, better leave now.
EVIL SCIENTIST
Okay.
(fucks off)
CUE: MISSION IMPOSSIBLE THEEEEMME!!!! AND WE'RE NOT OVERUSING IT THIS TIME AROUND SO BETTER ENJOY IT NOOWWWWW!!!!!
EXT. AIRSTRIP OF DRAMA
TOM CRUISE arrives dramatically at the AIRSTRIP to meet ALEC BALDWIN.
ALEC BALDWIN
Yes, I run IMF now, because Tom is just so amazing I had to switch agencies. We've learned that John Lark has arranged to meet a mysterious arms dealer called the White Widow.
TOM CRUISE
White Widow? We gonna meet Blue Sparrow later?
ALEC BALDWIN
The plan is for you to imfaceonate Lark and buy the plutonium instead. It's all up to your team because apparently the IMF has fewer agents than goddamn SHIELD now.
However who should stride up at that moment but CIA DIRECTOR ANGELA BASSETT flanked by HENRY CAVILL and HENRY CAVILL'S FACIAL HAIR!
ALEC BALDWIN
Oh no no no. Don't you dare Angela! You can't add your agent to this mission, what if we have too many good guys?! Fuck you and your trying to add more resources to this vitally important mission!
ANGELA BASSETT
Please. Tom is like a scalpel and Henry is a hammer. It might seem like international espionage is a delicate scalpel-like scenario, but I just like smashing shit and seeing what happens, y'know? Anyway Henry is going and that's final.
ALEC BALDWIN
What about the cheesy moustache?
ANGELA BASSETT
THAT IS GOING TOO AND THAT IS ALSO FINAL. It's, um,
(snickers)
really important. To the story.
(chuckles)
Heh heh heh, fuck you Warner.
INT. AIRPLANE OF ACTION
TOM and HENRY put on their supercool HALO skydiving outfits and strut about trying to assert themselves as MASTER CHIEF.
TOM CRUISE
Guess it's almost time to FALL OUT of the plane!
(winks)
HENRY CAVILL
Don't try anything cute, Tom. I'm an equal part of this mission, plus I'm big and manly, so don't fuck with me. Now how does this furshlugginer suit work anyway
(drops helmet)
Oops haha I'll just
(bonks head)
OW
(farts)
(trips into ten-tier wedding cake)
FNURTZ
(pratfalls out of plane)
WHOOOOPSSIIEEEEEE
TOM CRUISE
Wow, no way is a fuckup like THAT gonna be my nemesis this movie. Guess I can trust him!
TOM dramatically RESCUES HENRY and they head into the NIGHTCLUB full of FLASHY FLASHY LIGHTS because might as well get the OBLIGATORY MIGRAINES over with quickly.
INT. NIGHTCLUB OF DANGER
TOM and HENRY use GIZMOS to track JOHN LARK'S GIZMO and they find him in the BATHROOM.
TOM CRUISE
Good thing the 400 guys at this club all decided to take a shit ten minutes ago, leaving the bathroom wide open for a good old-fashioned punch-up!
TOM and HENRY start fistfighting LIANG YANG who they presume is JOHN LARK, and since he's a career stuntman who didn't get a dramatic introduction, WHY WOULDN'T HE BE?!? They have a PROLONGED, ROOM-DESTROYING, CONFUSING-GIF-GENERATING BATTLE, at the end of which LIANG YANG has DEFEATED HENRY and is about to KILL TOM---but is SHOT by either REBECCA FERGUSON or MICHELLE MONAGHAN!!!
REBECCA FERGUSON
Oh come on, it's me you idiots. Just because we're both brunettes with similar facial features and according to Google are both exactly 1.7 metres tall, really?
TOM CRUISE
Holy shit I can't believe it! I mean, getting saved in the nick of time I believe, but we actually brought back a supporting actress?!
REBECCA FERGUSON
That surprised me too, until I realized 'bringing shit back' is kind of a theme this time around...
TOM CRUISE
Now since my mask-making computer busted in the fight, I'll have to impersonate John Lark using my own face, and hope the White Widow has never met him in person!
HENRY CAVILL
Ooh, like in Ghost Protocol!
TOM CRUISE
Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol (2011) - IMDb
You're catching on.
The three of them head over towards the FANCY GALA ROOM where VANESSA KIRBY, the WHITE WIDOW, is hosting a function in her public persona of FUNDRAISING PHILANTHROPIST.
REBECCA FERGUSON
I have to warn you Tom, people are here to kill John Lark. I have no fucking idea who since I thought the Apostles were working with Lark?
TOM CRUISE
My briefing covered this, the Apostles do whatever needs to happen to create an action set-piece.
(approaching Vanessa)
Hi, I'm super evil. Let's do evil business together.
VANESSA KIRBY
Why yes, I do lots of evil business, person who could be literally anybody who stumbled across the name 'John Lark'! Please peruse this catalogue of my evil services! And did you know that every 10 evil transactions entitles you to a free-
The GOONS ATTACK requiring TOM and REBECCA and HENRY to start killing some dudes!
VANESSA KIRBY
Ooh I shall also whip out my concealed knife and kill some dudes with my assassin skills! The way fundraising philanthropists do. Seriously how the FUCK have I maintained a respectable cover identity for this long.
They ESCAPE!
INT. VANESSA'S PALACE OF PERIL
TOM and HENRY prepare to buy the plutonium, BUT!
VANESSA KIRBY
Oh no, you see, I'm just the broker here. In exchange for the plutonium, you must break Sean Harris out of custody and deliver him to me.
TOM CRUISE
So wait, who the fuck is your client? Is it the Apostles who just tried to kill me, and now want do to this deal with me?? So that they can fulfil John Lark's manifesto which implies they're working WITH him after all and if they already have the plutonium why would they be trading it TO him (which is really me) and-
VANESSA KIRBY
Let me distract you with an ethical dilemma! We have a plan to free Sean Harris that involves murdering tons of innocent cops.
We skip ahead to the PLAN where to maintain his cover TOM must GUN DOWN INNOCENT COPS, EVILLY!! My goodness this installment is really going to a dark place isn't it, putting TOM into truly horrible moral quagmires! What a bold and risky move by
TOM CRUISE
Oh haha that was just me daydreaming, I haven't actually done anything evil. So for the SECOND time, we've teased a major failure as though it really happened, then said 'NOT!'. This is our one new trick for this movie, you're welcome.
EXT. RANDOM CONCRETE LANDSCAPE OF INTRIGUE
HENRY secretly meets with ANGELA.
HENRY CAVILL
Y'know it would be reeeeallly sneaky of John Lark to infiltrate an American spy agency, then manipulate shit to get himself assigned to the John Lark case, yes sirree. Heh heh heh.
(pause)
Which is obviously what TOM did. Yeah, that's it. Look here's the phone we took from Liang Yang which is full of pictures of Tom wearing I AM JOHN LARK T-shirts.
ANGELA BASSETT
Hm but we saw that phone earlier and it was smashed. So clearly this is a fake and you're John Lark.
HENRY CAVILL
Well duh.
ANGELA BASSETT
That was kind of a low-key reveal of the major new villain, wasn't it.
HENRY CAVILL
Well it's not like they didn't fucking blab my villain status on every fucking entertainment news network months ago. Anyway we'll do the reveal again, later in the movie, and make it more dramatic next time.
ANGELA BASSETT
Cool.
EXT. PARIS, FRANCE, OF TENSION
It's BUST OUT SEAN HARRIS DAY! However TOM has thought of a NEW PLAN where he RAMS the armoured car holding SEAN, sending it into the RIVER!
TOM CRUISE
I'm so glad I thought of this new plan that won't endanger innocent cops!
COPS
(flailing to escape sinking armoured car while wearing 50 pounds of tactical gear)
Yeah, merci fucking beaucoup, dickwad.
TOM draws a NEW CARD from the REQUIRED STUNT DECK and gets... MOTORCYCLE CHASE! He leaps onto a MOTORCYCLE and leads the PARIS POLICE on an EPIC MARATHON CHASE through the city including the CHAMPS D'ELYSEES and the ARC DE TRIOMPHE while gaining MOST AGGRESSIVE RIDER CONSIDERATION and extending his GENERAL CLASSIFICATION LEAD even though on the final day of the Tour that's essentially decided already!!
TOUR DE FRANCE GREEN JERSEY WINNER PETER SAGAN
What, no sprint points?!
(winks)
TOM CRUISE
Maybe later.
(winks)
After quite a considerable length of time TOM finally rides directly into a CAR and WIPES OUT!!
TOM CRUISE
Oof! You know what they say, 90% of all accidents happen twenty feet from your pre-arranged rendezvous getaway point!
TOM cuts through a grate and drops down towards an UNDERGROUND RIVER, but falls into a BOAT with SIMON and VING who have also grabbed SEAN HARRIS! They meet up with HENRY at a garage and are about to leave but a YOUNG FEMALE FRENCH COP spots them!
TOM CRUISE
Ohmigod, a brunette with vaguely Monaghanesque features?!? I got this.
(to cop)
I don't suppose you're 1.7 metres tall are you? I have a tape measure...
ALIX BENEZECH
(wide-eyed)
Zut alors, I am cheesily fascinated by you!
(shot by goons)
Tabernac! Flee, mon petit, flee...
(sings Fantine's aria from Les Mis)
The gang start DRIVING OFF but suddenly, REBECCA-FERGUSON-or-MICHELLE-MONAGHAN-but-realistically-it's-gotta-be-REBECCA-FERGUSON is shooting at them!
TOM CRUISE
FUCK! Everyone get out before-
SIMON PEGG
Actually, despite the five of us being crammed into this stupidly tiny car with no room to breathe, all dozen or so of Rebecca's bullets passed through the car without wounding anyone. Maybe we should just ignore her.
TOM CRUISE
NOPE NOPE NOPE! Everyone out except me and Sean, the one person the mission depends on NOT getting shot, so I can drive straight at her!
TOM smashes his car directly into REBECCA and leaves her lying injured on the street, which in the world of SPY-TO-SPY RELATIONSHIPS is roughly equivalent to WAITING TWO DAYS BEFORE REPLYING TO A TEXT so they'll be fine.
EXT. BRIDGE OF SPIES (NOT THE SPIELBERG ONE)
TOM meets up with VANESSA again.
VANESSA KIRBY
So you have Sean, excellent. My clients will trade the plutonium for him... AND Rebecca, DUN DUN DUNNNN!
TOM CRUISE
That's fine, the exchange is never happening anyway, so why not. Fuck it, I'll throw in Jeremy Renner too, since he decided to go jerk it for this whole movie.
VANESSA KIRBY
Oh Tom, I'm so cheesily fascinated by you!
(smooches Tom)
TOM CRUISE
(winks to camera)
Still got it! And by 'it' I mean producer credit.
EXT. LONDON, ENGLAND OF ESPIONAGE -- THE NEXT DAY
REBECCA sees TOM walking around and walks after him. Then TOM walks a bit further and REBECCA walks to where he was but TOM has walked some more so REBECCA walks to that point but TOM has walked juuuust a bit extra so they STARE and then both WALK SIDEWAYS to between some trees, and if they were trying to be all subtle and sneaky about it well NOT SO MUCH GUYS.
REBECCA FERGUSON
I'm sorry, I'm under orders from MI-6 to kill Sean.
TOM CRUISE
You don't have to apologize for following the script, we're all doing that.
REBECCA FERGUSON
No no, not M:I6, MI-6.
TOM CRUISE
I don't follow, we AGREE this is M:I6. So why-
REBECCA FERGUSON
MI-6 THE BRANCH OF BRITISH SPECIAL INTELLIGENCE, NOT M:I6 THE SIXTH MISSION IMPOSSIBLE MOVIE DAMMIT ARGHHH
(uproots trees)
TOM CRUISE
Ah.
(light bulb)
Ohhh NOW I get it, the character Wong is played by Benedict Wong! So when Cumberbatch says
(punched in face)
INT. SUBTERRANEAN TUNNELS OF SUBTERFUGE
All the main characters gather to figure out the next step in the plan, along with ALEC BALDWIN!
ALEC BALDWIN
Okay, we'll disguise Simon as Sean, trade him for the plutonium, and then Simon will just rescue himself or something. That's a plausible-sounding plan! Let's go!
TOM CRUISE
Henry, you stay here and guard the 'real' Sean, oops I mean the real Sean, next to this laptop camera set to record everything that happens okay?
TOM and VING and REBECCA and SIMON and ALEC take off leaving HENRY alone with SEAN.
HENRY CAVILL
I guess it's finally time to do the second and more official reveal of myself as the Big Bad. So ta-da, I'm evil. And pissed.
SEAN HARRIS
Why?
HENRY CAVILL
BECAUSE I DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND ANY OF OUR GODDAMN EVIL PLAN.
(waves script around)
Look, here I say that we had a deal, you help me get the plutonium and I help you frame Tom as being John Lark. So are the Apostles your guys or my guys? Why were they sent to kill Lark if we're working together? Have my guys had the plutonium all along in which case why did I bother helping to free you? I'M SO FUCKING CONFUSED
SEAN HARRIS
Well I can't explain my scheme because...
(whips off mask)
I'm really Simon! We fooled you! And everyone's still here after all!
THE REAL SEAN HARRIS
Haha fuck you Henry! Apparently I went along with it just for funsies?
TOM CRUISE
So now we've proven--again--that YOU are the evil John Lark. Wait a sec, John LARK. Your character's name is Agent WALKER. You chose an alias made of letters from YOUR OWN NAME?!? DUDE! Fuck that would be like if I had a superhero alter ego called MOISTURE! Hm wait a sec.
(greenlights 'Moisture' movie)
(TOM CRUISE is BRINGING THE MOISTURE!! SUMMER 2021!!)
REBECCA FERGUSON
Eww.
ALEC BALDWIN
(into phone)
Did you get all that Angela?
ANGELA BASSETT
(on phone)
I did, I heard all of Henry's explicit, unambiguous confession of evil. But I've decided there are bad people on both sides so I'm arresting everyone.
Her CIA STRIKE FORCE swoops in, cuts the lights, and holds everyone at gunpoint!
HENRY CAVILL
But some of these are my guys, and it looks like I'm in charge of the evil goons again! Attack!
Lots of SHOOTING and FIGHTING breaks out! Our heroes make QUICK WORK of the GOONS while-
ALEC BALDWIN
It's so dark in here now, maybe I can semi-plausibly fight Henry!
(throws barroom brawl punches)
HENRY CAVILL
Nice try, Donaghy.
(stabs Alec!!)
(walks off)
ALEC BALDWIN
Argh, I'm done for!
(collapses)
Who can possibly catch Henry now, and avenge me?!?
VING RHAMES
I've put a tracker on Henry, now if only someone could race after him!
Everyone turns to stare at TOM.
TOM CRUISE
(looking down)
Um... so since Henry's on foot, guess I should steal a motorcycle or car or something and--
SIMON PEGG
We've already DONE motorcycles and cars! You know there's only one option here. What's the matter?
TOM CRUISE
(awkwardly)
Well it's just... I was thinking that I do this every movie and maybe it's time to...
ALEC BALDWIN
(weakly)
Tom, listen to me. You know you're gonna run. WE know you're gonna run. The ENTIRE AUDIENCE knows you're gonna run. But that's... okay. It's all okay because...
(coughs)
...because nobody runs like you, Tom. Nobody does it better. You ARE... the storm.
(fading)
Now go. Run... for me.
(dies)
TOM CRUISE
(nods solemnly)
All right.
(stretches)
(deep breath)
...Ready.
(brings systems online)
(activates heat shielding)
SET...
(revs up legs in windmill pattern while body stays in one spot)
NASA CONTROL
We are green for launch. Repeat, green for launch.
CUE: IMMIGRANT SONG THOR RAGNAROK MIX TIMES A MILLION
An EAR-SHATTERING BOOM shakes ALL OF LONDON as the AIR VIOLENTLY SHITS ITSELF and the SHEER ADRENALINE BLUR that is FULL RUNNING TOM CRUISE erupts forward!!!!
TOM CRUISE
(supersonic)
GGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
TOM TURBO-SMASHES his way through ROADS and BUILDINGS and OFFICES and CITIES and SOUND BARRIERS and QUANTUM REALMS and INTERGALACTIC JUMP RINGS and finally reaches an ELEVATOR five seconds after HENRY finishes leisurely strolling over, so that was quite the head start there Henry.
TOM CRUISE
Still not too late!
(grabs bottom of elevator)
HENRY CAVILL
Oh hey. Good thing this is an old-timey steel cage elevator so I can see you. Anyway let me escape or I'll murder the woman in this photo, I think it's Michelle Monaghan?
TOM CRUISE
(squints)
Yeah that's Michelle. DAMN YOUUUU HENRYY!!! DAMN YOUUUUUUU AAARRARARGHHHHHHHHHHH
SMASH CUT TO:
INT. BACK AT THE HIDEOUT OF HEROISM
TOM CRUISE
Anyway we also have a tracker on Sean, we can find him anywhere in the world, and it was our plan all along for him to escape. If you're counting, that's Total Failure Fakeout Number Three!
REBECCA FERGUSON
So all that running was--
TOM CRUISE
I MUST STEP AWAY TO HAVE MANLY FEELS NOW
VING RHAMES
Let me explain something Rebecca. Tom is one of those Action Heroes that gets a free pass to be 100% romantically committed to whoever's in the room with him at any given moment. That used to be Michelle, now it's you. And I think he might have taken that French cop's number, just FYI. I wouldn't worry about Vanessa so much unless she dyes her hair.
SIMON PEGG
Hey everyone! I've tracked Sean Harris to... Kashmir! Yet another different exotic foreign location, what are the odds!
TOM CRUISE
(returning)
It's the same location where the Apostles did a smallpox attack earlier! Now they have a medical village staffed by international volunteers. I wonder why he'd head there? Hmm. Hmm.
VING RHAMES
Yes why indeed. Say, how's Michelle doing in her international medical volunteer job?
TOM CRUISE
Fine I think. Though it concerns me that Henry said he could harm her anytime he wants. But... HOW?
SIMON PEGG
Maybe one of the international medical volunteers at the medical village where Sean and Henry are going might have a theory how international medical volunteer Michelle could possibly be mixed up in this.
REBECCA FERGUSON
(facepalms)
SIMON PEGG
But that's not our only problem. We know Henry and/or Sean now has two nukes, and they're controlled by a remote detonator. Flerble glorble blerb and that's why all three must be disarmed together at the very last moment. Off we go!
EXT. KASHMIR -- MEDICAL VILLAGE OF FINAL SHOWDOWNS
The GANG enter town and find MICHELLE MONAGHAN OR REBECCA FERGUSON BUT SINCE REBECCA IS RIGHT OVER THERE THIS MUST BE MICHELLE HOLYYY SHIIIIIT!!!!
TOM CRUISE
Michelle, what are you doing here?!?
MICHELLE MONAGHAN
We got an anonymous grant from the Agent Walk R. Johnlark Foundation so here we are. Oh this is my husband Wes Bentley, who knows nothing about you or the IMF.
TOM CRUISE
Excellent, we can have a nice long conversation about nothing then. Good time for a quick bathroom run, audience!
Cached
Eventually MICHELLE and WES move along and our heroes search for the NUKES.
VING RHAMES
I've found one! Also I'm already sitting next to it and I'm not fucking moving the whole rest of this movie.
REBECCA FERGUSON
And I see Sean lingering menacingly over there, I bet he's got a nuke!
(dashes off)
TOM CRUISE
And I see Henry over there, plus my X-ray telescopic vision tells me he has the remote!
(dashes off)
SIMON PEGG
And I, er, will stumble about and then help...
(rolls d6)
...Rebecca!
(dashes off)
In an unoccupied HUT, REBECCA slowly steps in only to be BLINDSIDED BY SEAN and TIED TO A CHAIR!! Then SIMON shows up, slowly stepping in only to be BLINDSIDED BY SEAN and TIED TO A NOOSE!!
REBECCA FERGUSON
(struggling)
Maybe we need to trade our slowly-stepping-in strategy for something new.
SIMON PEGG
Hm, how about this?
(hangs self)
Ack. Urk.
(passes out)
REBECCA FERGUSON
(breaks free)
There's an idea!
(strangles Sean with rope)
That was some good thinking Simon. Well done! Simon? Oh right, ha ha.
(saves Simon's life)
SIMON PEGG
Phew! Right, here's the second nuke. Ving, how're you doing?
VING RHAMES
Mission: Impossible (film) - Wikipedia
(on radio)
I realized too late you can't cut four wires with two hands at once, but luckily Michelle wandered over or we'd all be totes fucked.
SIMON PEGG
So now I guess it's ALL UP to TOM!
(grins to camera)
EXT. AW FUCK YEAH BIG CLIMACTIC HELICOPTER CHASE OH BOY!!
TOM has stolen a HELICOPTER to chase HENRY in his HELICOPTER!
TOM CRUISE
You're gonna get it now Henry! I've taught myself rudimentary heli-pilot skills so I can do my own aerial stunts!!
HENRY CAVILL
What if we paid a professional experienced stunt pilot to do some wicked awesome stunts though? I'm just saying...
TOM CRUISE
TOM CRUISE DOES HIS OWN FUCKING STUNTS OKAY?!? NOW FOR CRASHY CRASH TIME!
TOM SMASHES his COPTER into HENRY'S COPTER! They both CRASH and end up facing off on a CLIFF, a COPTER dangling below them held by a CABLE, and the all important DETONATOR lying precariously close to the edge!
TOM CRUISE
Right, time to earn those King of the Mountain points!
(winks)
(seriously, another Tour de France joke?!? What the fuck dude! At least we won't have to hear about Best Young Rider though, amirite, cycling fans?? Heh heh. Anyway let's return to the film)
HENRY CAVILL
Dammit, half my face melted in the crash! Am I gonna have to fight Batman again?
TOM CRUISE
At least I don't have to ask whether you bleed. Now die!
TOM and HENRY FIGHT and they both FALL OVER THE EDGE!
HENRY CAVILL
Ha ha, I grabbed the cable!
TOM CRUISE
Well I grabbed the cliff, shithead.
(pulls cable loose)
The METAL HOOK at the cable's end flies downward and OBLITERATES HENRY'S FACE and then he FALLS 30,000 FEET and then, juuust to be sure, the copter EXPLODES ENGULFING HENRY IN FIRE and the whole sorry mess gets eaten by THE MEG.
TOM CRUISE
Must... climb up... to reach... detonator! Can... I... get there... in...
But a BLINDING WHITE LIGHT fills the screen! HOLY SHIT, THEY FAILED AND ALL DIED INSTANTLY IN A NUCLEAR you're not buying this for a fucking second are you.
TOM CRUISE
Nope, that was just the sunrise, and I succeeded! Total Failure Fakeout... Number Four!
(collapses)
INT. MEDICAL TENT OF DENOUEMENT
TOM wakes up in a hospital bed surrounded by all the surviving supporting cast. REBECCA whispers something to MICHELLE but since it's the only time in the entire movie two women talk to each other, we don't hear it.
ANGELA BASSETT
Well done Tom. I showed up at the last second and based on what I saw, I now 100% believe in you, even though I didn't really see anything. Oh did I mention how Vanessa Kirby works with us, and always has? Please don't think about how horribly that fucks up the entire plot.
SIMON PEGG
Woo-hoo! Chalk up another victory for the team!
(pause)
Y'know, I did more action stuff in Hot Fuzz than I've done in this entire franchise. Funny that.
VING RHAMES
Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol - English Transcript ...
(calcifying)
Quite.
MICHELLE MONAGHAN
Glad you made it Tom. I'll always love you. Right, who's next in line?
REBECCA FERGUSON
Oh that'd be me. Glad you made it Tom, I'll always love you. Anyone else?
Cast Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol
ALIX AND VANESSA
Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol Script Pdf Free
(via Skype)
Glad you made it Tom! We love you!
TOM CRUISE
(grins)
Yep. Stillll got it!
(pause)
(to camera)
I'm going to keep making these fucking movies till I'm 85, you do realize that.
END